January 23, 2021
Hi I’m Rachel, and I really like humans!
Here I am, laughing with the amazing @kelseymkurtis last year in what feels like another lifetime. She captured my me-ness so well.
I found myself here. In Rome. I went from being a 22-year old fun-loving party girl who thought she’d work in NYC for a fancy PR firm to a 33-year old yoga teacher, tour guide, writer (and party girl) who lives and breathes Italy.
Humans made me who I am; tourists from all over the world who lived lives I’d never see and for brief moments they experienced my Rome, my interpretations of its history, my growing awareness and sense of self.
I was reading a post from the incredibly gorgeous and self-reflective @eringilmore and it brought my attention to something I hadn’t realized just how much I’d been missing. Yeah, it’s easy to say: I miss humans, I miss touch and hugs and shaking hands with strangers, I miss the steady source of income that came from guiding people around my beautiful city.
But you know what else? I miss the validation and appreciation and praise that came along with it. Thanks, Erin. It’s okay to miss being recognized and validated as special. It’s a little scary to write that I need approval that much, but, yeah. A little bit. Sometimes I do.
I used to joke that it was very good that I was a tour guide cause it helped me burn off some of the insane people-pleasing energy that constantly swirls around inside me. After a full day of work it was easier to be “normal” around the amazing people in my life. Now it’s all raw and it’s all real and we’re all becoming a whole lot more comfortable naming our fears, our worries, our self-perceived flaws.
And that feels like enough for now. So, yeah, I’m damn lucky to have some really awesome humans in my life. I’m lucky to have people who call me out on my shit and who lift me up too. We’re all so thirsty for human interaction these days, in one way or another, right?
Homework: Go and tell someone something you love about them today. It’s always worth it, I promise
